Sorry Santa, but Bart Simpson socks just don’t cut it
any more. What men really want to unwrap on Christmas morning, sat under the
plastic conifer is… the best technology money can buy.
Cold hard tech. Shiny shiny things with buttons and
switches that will take until Boxing Day to work out exactly what they do.
Gizmos, gadgets, games – things with instruction manuals so confusing they can
make a grown man cry into his turkey dinner.
These days Christmas just isn’t
Christmas without some kind of new device that usually involves a USB cable. So here’s my guide to the best 10 things you could buy any man in your life this Christmas…
Very few people need
an iPad, but still every grown man in the western world wants one. Even if they deny their secret lust to own one of
Apple’s handsome tablets, put one in your man’s hands and he’ll cooo, he’ll
smile, his heart will melt, he’ll fall instantly in love with the thing. Then
you won’t see him until about New Year’s Eve as he pokes, plays and downloads
stuff. They might seem expensive, but this is one present he’ll still be
playing with this time next year, which is more than you can say for that electric
tie rack you bought him last Christmas.
Pretty much everyone has a digital camera these days, most
of us have one on our phone capable of taking pretty decent snaps. However, when
you want to go beyond snap-shots and into proper photography you need a digital
SLR. Sony’s new SLR combines the stunning quality of a high-end camera with the
compact convenience of a standard “grin and click” pocket camera.
It’s pricy but could deliver a definite wow factor to this year’s
Perfect for watching It’s a Wonderful Life, or an Only Fools
box set on a Xmas afternoon. It’s hard for a Blu-ray player to be stylish, most
are just ugly black boxes, but this thing is like the sports car of Blu-rays as it
can hang on your wall like a piece of art and looks stunning. What’s more, it can
download movies from the internet wirelessly. That’s surely enough to make a grown man choke
on a mince pie in awe.
If the Three Wise Men were to visit a babe in a manger in 2011,
they’d probably forget about Frankincense and pack a 3D camcorder
instead to capture the proceedings. Imagine recording miracles on this thing. With this the lucky receiver of your gift can
make their very own Avatar (just add a bucket of blue paint and some foliage). Don’t forget, you’ll need a 3D TV to watch footage back.
A great value speaker that is made all the more impressive as it can play your music as you walk
around your house via Bluetooth. It also has batteries so you can take it out
in the garden to serenade you as you build a snowman. The perfect device to
blast out Fairytale of New York at inhumane volumes while you chew through
sprouts with your hungry relatives.
If the man you’re buying for is a bit of a BBQ addict, don’t
waste your cash on novelty aprons or gimmicky sausage pokers. This could very
well be what he really wants. Teppanyaki is essentially a style of Japanese
cuisine that uses an iron griddle to cook food indoors. Set one of these bad
boys up in your kitchen and you’ve got an indoor BBQ of sorts to cause merry
havoc with. Not ideal for cooking turkey, but Teppanyaki Steak on New Year’s Eve
will go down pretty nicely.
Destined to be the number one game of Xmas, Santa is going
to be delivering these by the truck load. But, what better way to celebrate Christmas than with some strangers from another country playing online. Make sure the man you’re buying a copy for
hasn’t already got one though, as just about every Xbox owner will surely
have a CODMW3 by the start of 2012.
If you’re looking for a stocking filler, or simply trying to
keep Christmas spending down to a realistic minimum in these difficult economic
times, this digital camera provides absolutely excellent value-for-money. There’s
7.1 megapixels and loads of extra features such as a decent digital zoom and anti-shake for when you come out in the meat sweats from all that turkey.
You’ll have to buy quick, as the 3DS looks set to be one of
the biggest sellers this holiday season. Not surprising considering that with these latest
3DS models you can enjoy gaming, take 3D snaps of Aunty Wendy
falling asleep to the Queen’s Speech and get online with other players using Wi-Fi. We reckon Father Christmas will probably have a sneaky game of Mario Kart 3D before he drops them down the chimney – and who can blame him!
If you’re feeling very generous, or just want to buy one
massive present – no not for yourself – instead of loads of smaller ones… this is it. Buy some lucky
fella this and you’ll no doubt be revelling in an ocean of gratitude until way
beyond Easter 2013. This is an absolute belter of a TV, Wi-Fi built-in, 3D, HD, as
big as a barn (well 55 inches), brilliant. This is so damned lovely in fact
it’ll make even watching the EastEnders annual Christmas tragedy seem jolly and